We invest in our friends. Our time. Our money in going out to eat and attending celebrations together. Our emotional energy. Many of our friendships grow out of situations where we are thrown into frequent contact with the same people. Classes. Activities. Jobs. We each have limited bandwidth, so we have to pick and choose where to invest our time. Several years ago, I made the decision to prioritize friendships with people who are on social media. Why? Because that way, when the person moves away – and inevitably, the person leaves – all that investment is not wasted. Instead of waving at each other when we pass on the street, we check in on each other via daily status updates, likes and comments. And when we see each other in person? It is like no time has passed.
I also began to strategically focus on spending high-quality time with the best of the best. What do I mean by the best of the best? People who are at the absolute top of their fields. In June 2015, I was the NYC ambassador for a blogging conference hosted by a renowned marketing agency. I spent thirty-six hours with fifty of the most influential bloggers in the United States. The results were extraordinary. I came away with five to ten friends. Some connected to me immediately on social media, others sent requests months later. Now these people make me laugh and cry every day on social media. When they share their lives, their experiences make me think and see different situations from different perspectives. We share professional knowledge – two days ago a friend messaged me asking for my advice on a contract negotiation. This is a gift beyond measure, one that is more valuable than money.
I am looking to repeat that experience this Saturday, March 5th at the Speak Up Women conference held at the United Nations. Full disclosure – I am a speaker on the Community panel and am debuting my book there. Today, Thursday, March 3rd, is the absolute last day to register (use coupon code SpeakUpWomenFlashSale to get 40% off the regular ticket price). There will be people from the film industry. Venture capital. Philanthropy. Every single person involved with the event is donating their time. Why? Because we believe in this event. Speaking up is a highly neglected skill. It takes a lot of practice to be good at it, yet it is something that most people avoid at all costs. Why? Because they do not want to be branded as a loudmouth. A troublemaker. So when a crisis happens – and inevitably, crises come to everyone at some point in our lives – they are powerless to stop it, or to at least mitigate the impact.
I post every single day on social media, transparently sharing my life. Why? Partly to inspire others. To make friends who support me during good times and bad. But also? To protect myself and my family. Every single time I post – and I have posted tens of thousands of times across over a dozen social media platforms over the last six years – I am building my reputation. One of the first things that people do when they meet me is google my name. And when they see the pages of results that appear, they know to proceed with caution. Having a world full of people who are on their best behavior around me? Can only be a good thing.
Kathy Zucker is an international social media Shorty Award winner, mother of three and a startup founder at companies including the Metro Moms Network®.
