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Kathy Zucker

Award winning writer • startup founder • mom of 3

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Show The World What You Stand For With Every Step You Take

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Your ‪husband‬ must be so proud of you, the sales clerk says. He is, I respond. Every time I do something like speak at the UN, it makes his stock go up at ‪work‬. There are a bunch of people at his job who follow my ‪career‬, they are always asking about what I am up to.

I am standing in the dressing room of my favorite store. I have just tried on a variety of ‪outfits‬, ranging from leisure wear to an ‪orange‬ ‪silk‬ shirt that drew me to the rack like a magnet to a lodestone. So when the sales clerk asked why I always wear ‪pink‬? I showed her the garments I had chosen and explained how each one helps me be a ‪walking‬ advertisement for my ‪business‬.

My husband works very long hours. Yesterday, he came home exhausted after dealing with a database outage that derailed the project he was working on. He spent the evening finishing this project from our bedroom.

While he was working, I fed the kids dinner. Supervised a playdate with two other families. Fielded requests for us to attend events this weekend. And in between taking care of my family? I got ideas for work projects, that I filed away to execute after the kids went to bed.

My husband and I are equally committed to our family. However, his work takes priority over our family schedule. And my work? Fits around our family.

Why did I agree to this arrangement? Am I less capable than my husband? Did I earn less money before we had children? No and no. I agreed to this setup – indeed, initiated it – because this was the only way I could have three children.

Childbirth is physically exhausting. I also have difficult pregnancies, plus am committed to breastfeeding. With each child, I lose 18-24 months of my life. It is only now, when my youngest child is four, that I am back to where I was before I became a parent. And now? We are extremely fortunate that my husband has a job that involves no travel plus allows him to handle the morning routine for our older two children. But we have three tiny people who have softball games and dance classes. Whose tummies hurt and need to be picked up early from school because their eyes hurt from allergy season.

With each child, the odds go up exponentially that something will happen requiring the physical presence of a parent. That means many families have only one or two children. The greatest gift my being an entrepreneur has given my family? Is a third child who fills all our lives with joy.

Kathy Zucker is an international social media Shorty Award winner, mother of three and a startup founder at companies including the Metro Moms Network®.

Create Symbols That Help You Stand Out In a Crowd

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I look at the shirt hanging in the closet. Look again. I have been avoiding this moment for months as I slowly declutter my wardrobe. I have tried on business suits. Tailored pants. Boxy button down shirts. All have gone in a bag to be donated to a local charity that helps women get back to work. Each time, I have deliberately avoided the corner where this wildly patterned #silk shirt hangs. But now, the moment of reckoning has arrived. I will never wear this shirt again, and I know it.

Why do I cling to this shirt? Because it represents the moment when the tide of my life began to shift. I bought this shirt when my two older children were babies, on a shopping trip to the store where I bought everything from baby formula to refrigerator light bulbs. Wore it when I had professional pictures taken for the first time since #college. One of those photos became my profile picture on social media.

And when I wore this shirt walking down the street? People did double takes as they recognized me.

Swim goggles. Olives for my husband. Laundry detergent. When I go shopping, at a glance my cart is loaded with items that add up to a whopping total at the cash register. But if you look more closely at the cart? You will see that there is nothing in there for me. And that? Is the normal state of affairs.

When I began working from home, I stopped spending money on myself. With the arrival of our first child, every available dime was sucked into the black hole of her needs. I was unable to successfully breastfeed, so formula consumed a substantial portion of our household budget. And with plans for another child, there was no point in spending money on clothing that would not fit in a matter of months.

I kept everything in the early parenting years. Bags of boy and girl clothing in case we decided to have a third child. Toys. And also? My work wardrobe. I had one goal when I became an entrepreneur – to keep my career alive so I could return to work when the children grew older and more self-sufficient. Those business suits and button down shirts were a promise to myself, a symbol of a future when I could reclaim my paycheck.

The day when I could fit back into my work clothes is one that shines in my memory. Why? Because it was a step toward independence. But also? Because it was the day I was mistaken for a waitress. I dug out a jacket and skirt to attend a fundraiser to benefit a local park. By dressing professionally, I was making a statement that I was moving toward returning to work. But in a room filled with casually – and expensively dressed – moms, I looked more like the wait staff.

The moment when I made my way to the bathroom, only to have a mom reach out and touch me on the arm to ask for more bread? Was the moment when I knew I had to begin investing in myself. Specifically, in my wardrobe. And now? Eight years later, I have a closet full of separates that I can mix and match to take me anywhere and make it instantly clear what I stand for.

Kathy Zucker is an international social media Shorty Award winner, mother of three and a startup founder at companies including the Metro Moms Network®.

Create Celebrations That Satisfy Your Soul

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What do you want for your ‪birthday‬? my ‪husband‬ asks. The ‪kids‬ are asking for ‪dinner‬ out, but it’s supposed to snow, I reply. I would rather ‎cook‬ dinner and spend the ‪money‬ we save on a ‪shopping‬ excursion. The kids can decorate the ‪homemade‬ cake I ‪baked‬ and froze.

The day before the big day, I take the cake out of the freezer. Go shopping for dinner ingredients. Along the way, I stop at my favorite clothing retailer. There, I find exactly what I am looking for. A new ‪pink‬ handbag. A silver backpack for ‪sports‬ and ‪family‬ outings. A new set of ‪fencing‬ warm-ups. And? A ‪blue‬ shirt in exactly the color of my ‪college‬ sports ‪team‬ colors.

Two weeks ago, I traveled to Waltham, MA to watch my college win the fencing NCAA championships. While I was packing for the trip, I discovered something – I do not own anything in my college colors of pale blue and white. With no time to go shopping, I packed a bag full of black and white garments, and added in pink shoes and handbags. The result? Nobody could tell I was affiliated with my school except when they happened to notice the embroidered logo on my black quilted vest. Which, of course, I wore nonstop during the four day fencing expedition.

So when I spotted a pale blue v-neck top on the rack at my favorite store? My eye was drawn to it like a magnet. And when I tried it on, and it fit perfectly? I headed online to search for more.

Kathy Zucker is an international social media Shorty Award winner, mother of three and a startup founder at companies including the Metro Moms Network®.

Teach Your Kids Loyalty – Chicago Cubs

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I want to wear my ‪Cubs‬ shirt, the toddler says. Her big ‪brother‬ and ‪sister‬ are scurrying around searching for jerseys and hats ‪branded‬ with the logo of their favorite ‪baseball‬ ‪team‬. It is ‪Jersey Day at ‪school‬, and my youngest child wants to wear a ‪sports‬ ‪outfit‬ to ‪preschool‬ so she looks just like the big ‪kids‬.

I locate her ‪pink‬ jersey. A pair of leggings are next to it. ‪Frozen‬ socks. I have never seen her get dressed this fast, this early. When ‪my husband‬ emerges from his room to drive the kids to school, all three of them are ready to go. Bye, ‪mom‬, her voice calls as it fades in the distance.

Being a Chicago Cubs fan in the New York City area is difficult. My oldest child has come home crying after being teased by classmates for wearing a Cubs shirt. We tell her it’s okay to be a Yankees fan. But time after time, she reaches for her Cubs shirt even though she knows she will be greeted by derision instead of smiles. A few months ago, my husband scoured New York sports stores looking for Cubs gear to give the kids as holiday gifts. He found a surprising quantity of items but ultimately headed online because he knew the girls would prefer to wear pink.

And now? They wear their Cubbie shirts and hats with pride.

Kathy Zucker is an international social media Shorty Award winner, mother of three and a startup founder at companies including the Metro Moms Network®.

Clothe Your Children In Love

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Her eyes open in the darkness. I don’t want to miss ‪‎school‬, she says. Okay. She drinks her ‪chocolate‬ milk snuggled into a soft blanket. I dress her in the same spot. ‪Sparkle‬ pants. Flowered top. Soft, snuggly jacket. Scuffed ‪pink‬ boots. Every garment she wears is one that she has ‪loved‬ for years.

Each time she insists on clinging to a beloved and outgrown piece of clothing, I scour the mall and auction sites to find larger versions. And the next winter? Her face fills with ‪joy‬ when she sees familiar favorites that are magically large enough to fit.

Every step I take this winter is filled with nostalgia. I visit baby stores for the last time. After this year, my youngest child will be too big to wear size 5T. I smile at new mothers struggling to calm fussy infants as we both stand in the checkout line. They note the pile of soft, sparkly, pink clothing in my shopping cart and ask about my children. Their eyes widen when I tell them I have three kids, ages nine, eight and three. How do you do it? one mom asks. It’s hard, I reply. I thought I was going to die for the first six years. By the time I had the third kid, I knew what to do, so life got a lot easier.

Kathy Zucker is an international social media Shorty Award winner, mother of three and a startup founder at companies including the Metro Moms Network®.